Wednesday, June 16, 2010

Another sleepless night

It was another sleepless night for me yesterday..

But it was for a very different reason..

I read Ida's post yesterday morning and I was upset for the rest of the day.

I can't burst out crying because my room in my new office does not have a door and I do not really that much privacy...but I was on the verge of tears a couple of times.

I was itching to get home and see Airiel but had to rush something and only got home around 9.30 at night by which time, Airiel had already fell asleep.

I can't read these things, losing a child is a grief which I cannot fathom and which I pray to God everyday that I would never have to face.

Airiel was sleeping in his buai. I softly took him out and carried him upstairs.

I held him and rocked him back and forth.. and I cried..and cried..and cried.

I don't know why.

Ida, I do not know your friend...and I will never be able to understand the pain she or Diar goes through.

But I know as I held Airiel in my arms that I would gladly give my life and everything I have for  him...the love I felt as a mother was so great... I cannot describe it.

Losing a child is ..sigh

I cannot write about this anymore.

Al-Fatihah

3 comments:

  1. i think bout it everyday too. what if? how would? when will? kematian itu adalah suatu yg pasti. but i pray that when the time comes for my loved ones to depart, i would have the strength to face the qada and qadar. i would cry, but i would accept it and move on. i pray for this.

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  2. Idza dear,
    InsyaAllah, Tuhan lebih tahu apa yang terbaik kan?

    And yes Ida, semoga Tuhan bagi kekuatan utk kita hadapi semua ini. Amin!

    Wahida

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  3. Ida : I fear loss..and I tire of grief..yes let us pray

    Kak Wahida : You are right indeed..Amin

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