Thursday, June 9, 2011


I know that the title of my post is that of a Rihanna song, but I am disturbed. I have been busy with work...and have not had a chance to blog about what has been bugging lately but lest I go insane with all these thoughts in my head, I might as well do it now.

I'm sure everyone has read about the girl who has said 'saya sudah what kalau takde dara at least saya ada maruah diri...'. I have read the post and have read the comments to her post. I have to admit that I did not really feel sorry for her apparent lack of tact and judgment (I thank God the world wide web was something rather new at the time when I was 14...god knows what I would have blogged about kan???...) but I was disturbed. I was disturbed to finally see the very 'real' fact that our younger generation are now having sex or experimenting with sex at such an early age. I was not surprised though, as throughout my years in the UK, I knew for a fact that the girls in my school would start having sex at that age..some as early as 13 even. But I am disturbed even more that this is happening in Malaysia.

Flashbacks of incidents of parents scolding teachers for disciplining their children in recent years suddenly flashed through my mind. I have a nagging feeling that one has something to do with the other but I can't put my finger on it. Is it a sign that most parents of this generation believe that their kids can do no wrong? I don't know. All I know is what I have experienced myself and I remember my parents telling my teacher in front of me during the beginning of every school year 'Cikgu pukullah dia kalau dia buat salah, jangan sampai patah tulang sudah dan janganlah pukul kat kepala'. And that was when I realised the respect that I must give to my teachers....for my parents does not believe in hitting their children to advocate discipline, and yet they expressly gave the mandate to do so to my teachers. I don't know whether the same respect is accorded to them by the parents of today.

I am disturbed by the fact that a newborn baby was thrown off from the 5th floor of a building and has its brains splashed out on the street. I am disturbed by the fact that post mortem results indicate the baby was alive when it was thrown off. And reading that piece of news reminded me of that 'saya sudah main' girl...because I realise that baby dumping stems from this 'experimenting with sex' wave that has taken over the younger generation of this country by storm.

I am disturbed because I do not know what is causing all of this..and without that knowledge I am thus powerless to stop it.

I realise that with the feeling of being disturbed, I am actually feeling something else... and that is FEAR. I fear of the surroundings that my children will grow up in. As a parent I am deadly afraid because I do not know how to protect Airiel and my future kids from any of these influences.

I shall sleep now and hope for a better tomorrow. But I know that it won't be the case. That baby will still be dead, and that girl will still have no shame over what she did....

And this fear just grips my heart to no end... sigh

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