Sorry is the hardest word

No one may know what this post is about... just bear with me..I am rambling again.

I want that 'sorry'.

I want it for every single appointment missed, for pains went through alone. I want it.

I want that sorry for every single sms sent and received I read and found. I want it.

I want that sorry for those 5 months of hell I endured down south. I want it.

I want that sorry for the Rawa trip. I want it.

And I don't want a half a*ss baked sorry that does not mean shi*t. I want to hear that sorry said with tears in your eyes just because you should know it is incomparable to the tears I have shed.

I want to hear the sorry said on bended knee because it is incomparable to the shame I have suffered on your behalf.

I want that 'sorry' to be sincere

I want keikhlasan

I want that 'sorry' because I sure as hell deserved it.

Know that this 'sorry' that I want would have made all the difference.

I have hopes that one day I will hear that word.

I wait and am still waiting for the hardest word to be said and be said with conviction..

And so I hope and wait.

Don't make me wait too long