Friday, March 9, 2012


There are just some things you see or hear which just disturbs you and makes you reflect on your life and the people around you. I have had a whole week of those...

Early this week I saw 2 friends of mine on FB having a political debate (if you could call it that) about the issue of the handicapped farmer who was stopped all aid from the Sarawak Assistant Minister of Modernisation and Agriculture because of his political affiliations. One naturally was condemning the ruling party coalition while the other of course, was acting in its defence. As the debate heightened and name calling about that political party and this political party started to surface, I asked them 'Wait guys, has anybody thought about the farmer?'. In usual fashion of course, this being Malaysia, I was met with overwhelming silence. So, whilst everyone was talking about how cruel and/or mean one political party is over the other, no one cared about the fate of the handicapped farmer. Not really.

And today I saw on FB a video of an old, aging mother who has been abandoned by her child and/or family and/or whoever in a budget hotel. Even the reporter (a male no less) who covered the story was openly sobbing as the old, teethless makcik (whose words you cannot really make out) cried her heart out. I was disturbed because I was reminded of something I read regarding filial obligations on FB as well. I realise that our generation (and by this I mean mine) tries to rationalise almost everything, even obligations we owe to the most sacred of persons, our parents. What I read actually makes perfect logical sense of course, but then again there are some things in life which logic simply plays no part in, you know what I mean? I cannot help but wonder whether these rationalisations questioning the duty in which we owe our parents which I read about are what brought that crying, ailing and toothless makcik to that hotel, only to be left there.

I am a parent myself and know that one day, I will outlive my usefulness. I will grow old and will not see as well, would have all my teeth fall out and may need assistance to walk, eat, bathe, wear my clothes. I know that I have made my own choices when I decided to have children, to carry each of them in my belly for 9 months, to endure the pain of labour, to spend the remainder of my youth providing for them the best I can and how I try to be the best parent I could to them. I know that my children did not have the privilege of choosing the parents that they perhaps would have wished to have as opposed to just me and Aries. I know all that.

At the back of my mind I just wonder, would my children one day tell me 'You chose to have me as a child but I did not choose you as my mother'? Would my children one day tell me 'It is your job and responsibility to raise me, but I am under no duty to do the same'? or that 'You did not do a good job as a mother'?

Would I be crying to a camera, unable to speak and having strangers bathe me, change my diapers and feed me like what I saw today?

Disturbed I am, to say the least...

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